The Internet offers a lot of opportunities for people to find love and relationships outside their homeland. Asian brides, with their exotic beauty and feminine charm, are particularly popular among Wester men. A romantic relationship with an Asian beauty is probably one of the most fascinating, yet sometimes difficult relationships a Western man could experience. There are at least four stages that a couple has to go through along the way towards marriage. Knowledge of these stages will help make the relationship happier and healthier.
Stage 1: ROMANCE STAGE
All relationships start with this stage, which is characterized by enchantment, fantasies, and hopes for the future. Everything is wonderful and exciting. The couple focus on similarities and do everything to please each other. Differences are seen as bad so are denied. On the average, this stage lasts two months to two years. It is short lived because you cannot be a whole person. Romancing takes up a lot of energy with all the courting and pretending and inevitably you begin to tire, leading to the next stage of power struggle.
Stage 2: POWER STRUGGLE STAGE
The need fulfilled now is power and a certain degree of freedom. There is now an awareness that you are different .You begin to focus on every small detail and your differences are magnified. You seem to have nothing in common anymore. There is a need for space, freedom and a chance to breathe, all of which is quite normal. This stage is a prerequisite to readiness to relate to each other as whole people. On the bright side, it’s an opportunity to journey together, and to declare one’s own individuality and separateness.
Stage 3: STABILITY STAGE
This is a resting stage. The war is over and it’s time to relax. You are now aware of each others’ personal world and the difference is acceptable. It is finally clear that you are not going to change each other. Clear boundaries are now determined. The danger at this stage is the couple may begin to fall apart because each does their own thing. There may be a feeling of boredom, a sense of not being connected and having nothing in common. The positive aspect is that at this stage you have history and it can be used to your advantage. Don’t throw away the relationship easily.
Stage 4: COMMITMENT STAGE
This is the only stage where the couple is really ready for marriage. In this stage you are wide awake, making sensible choices about yourself and your partner, based on both individual differences and the things you have in common. You know exactly who you are and what you want as well as who your partner is and what she wants. The needs fulfilled here are a balance of love, belonging, fun, and freedom. You don’t need each other, you choose to be with each other. This is the only way that a healthy relationship should be.